The Tri-Sacred King Tournament

My neck produced another sign, like a tatoo that burned on the skin. It said: " The Tri-Sacred King Tournament will be exhibiting in a theater nearest you."...... I am vexed by it! What purpose would serve this message? Giving me instructions of what I should have begun preparing but haven't this summer? On the other hand, this tournament is going to atract people. I need people to make the war on the gay-blood boy. I better start preparing events, getting the amenities, the gravediggers, the decorations, the ju-jus and the gyros the music.

Each summer when the sun begins our full light solstice we look for the sacred specimen that shalt enchant us with his superb physical strength, cunning and skillful use of the bow. That breeding animal shalt inherit a prize most guarded, most perfect, most centered and most highly valued: Me.

This sacred king will prolong his family lineage by the proper recognition of his abilities, the quiz of his strengths in the wielding of swords and upon me. His role will be recognized in procreation as a co-contributor for one whole year alone. His primary moral obligations and duties will he fulfill at the end of the year and this shalt be revealed to him in due course.

--"Now try ye all my barons, but beware ye be not stained with shame, treachery nor guile and ye may not be shorter than 3 inches at the time of competing, for I may want a tall and long lasted king "...

We'll choose three main barons for the events on this tournament. They will have to risk their reputation by making difficult choices and by attempting tasks where they'll fear failure. First, against a Nemean lion, then the Cretan bull, the Erymanthian boar, and last against the Artemis deer. ( The leviathan from Phoenicia and the Behemoth from Israel were already too expensive to bring here.)

I am considering adding also fake prizes to our competitors: one possibility is to offer the hand in marriage of Penislope, our masculined- torso- maiden. She deceives the most astute of knights, talking gravely, and acting rough. If the barons accept avidly the marriage with this maiden thinking she is a hermaphrodite, they will get a sour surprise. In a second, the act will be raised and the maiden shalt uncover her privates and they will get discualified from the tournament. (Penislope is really a veteran award winning actress who was sentensed to pose as a male by our justice council on the charge for public indecency.) Onto it we will discover the real orientation of my barons.